I Remember 9/11

Each year as the 9/11 date gets closer, I am a little more solemn and more aware of the world around me. But as the 10th anniversary of that tragic and painful day looms, I find myself reflecting a little more on the significance of that day and how life is today. It’s not that I only think about that day once a year. I think about it every time my husband needs to be gone from our family for 2-3 weeks at a time. I think about it every time I fly and have to deal with TSA drama. I think about it every time I see my family friend Jared who enlisted in the Marines shortly after 9/11 and who survived being struck by an IED in Iraq despite the odds being stacked very high against him. I think about that day more often than I’d like to admit. But most of the time, the memories remind me to appreciate my freedoms and not take them for granted, to help people who need it, and to  to honor and respect the people who risk their lives every day to keep me safe.

I made a pledge 10 years ago that I would never forget that horrid day. I believe that once we forget, we go back to believing Americans are invincible. I have a “We Will Never Forget” window decal that has been on display for 10 years, either on a car, on the front door, or on the window. Right now, it clings to a window at the front of the house. I know that most people can’t see it or even know it’s there. I don’t display it for them. It hangs for me so that every time I look out that window I remember that I am not invincible and need to do my part to make a difference in the world.

I remember 9/11

I remember the fear, the confusion, the anger, and the selfish gratitude I felt that day when I knew no one I loved was lost.

I remember that the plans my friend Tami and I had to go get our navels pierced that day suddenly became very unimportant.

I remember that I was “working from home” for a company that was badly suffering from the tech bubble burst and had already been through 5 rounds of layoffs that year. For me, “working from home” meant logging in to my email multiple times a day to see if I had an actual work to do and wondering how long it would be until my job was eliminated along with those of so many of my friends.

I remember that I was sitting in my husband’s big, comfy recliner eating a plate of eggs and getting ready to watch an old episode of “Little House on the Prairie” when my friend Tami called and asked if I was watching the news. (Yes, “working from home” back then was a joke. And it would be less than 2 months before I was added to the list of folks the company had to let go). Tami asked if I was watching the news. I laughed and jokingly responded, “Did you just ask me if I had the news on?” Ever since I’d taken a TV in Popular Culture class in college where I spent a good chunk of time dissecting the what’s and why’s of the news, I had a very hard time sitting and watching it for the purpose of staying up to date with current events. Tami wasn’t amused and told me I needed to turn on the news.

I remember turning on the Today Show and seeing fire and smoke and hearing Tami say we were under attack.

I remember being in disbelief that something so awful could happen on American soil.

I remember thinking  I was watching a replay of the 1st tower fall while on the phone with my sister only to realize that I was watching the 2nd tower fall live on TV. All I could say was “Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God.”

I remember running up the street to my neighbor’s house to find her trying to figure out how to get her son from school without taking her two younger children with her.

I remember wanting to call my husband to let him know what was happening and thinking that because of his job he already knew anyway. I would soon learn that he didn’t know until he got a call from someone shouting “We’re under attack! Get your people and get out!” He was working in a building that could have been hit too had the FAA not grounded all the planes.

I remember filling up our cars with gas so that we had a full tank in case it became important and then going to BJs to stock up on toilet paper and other essentials.

I remember wanting to sit on my mother’s lap so she could hold me and tell me everything would be alright.

I remember being terrified for my friends Tommy and Lori who were working or living in NYC and waiting for what seemed an eternity before I knew they were ok.

I remember knowing that my life would never be the same again.

On the 10th anniversary of 9/11

I remember why I must never forget.

And I will NEVER forget.